What Would YOU Call It?

When we take a road trip we like to DO something to help pass the miles. Sometimes we fall back on the reliable alphabet game using road signs and license plates. But now that we travel without the kids we've branched out a bit.

Our first RV trip out west we were gone for almost seven weeks.....and kept a list of road kill. Raccoons won. Our then ten-year-old grandson thought it was so funny because we would text him with updates. Then the next time we kept track of wildlife.....alive. That was fun too....especially when we realized we were well over 200 pronghorn!

Last time we thought we'd keep track of slogans for the small towns we passed. "The Friendliest Town in Iowa!" or "Buckle of the Cornbelt" etc. but we sort of lost interest.

But I already have a theme for the next trip. We are going to write down all of the different labels for rest rooms along the way. All because of lunch today at a restaurant in Bar Harbor.

We've all seen the typical labels that sometimes reflect different areas of the country: Men's and Ladies, Gents and Ladies, His and Hers, Cowboys and Cowgals, and the simple drawing that shows the outline of a person wearing a skirt or pants. But today we found the BEST!

We were having lunch in Bar Harbor and there it was....two doors. Inboards and Outboards.

We both made the right choice!.

GPS vs Paper Road Map.....

We use our GPS. It's an amazing tool, helping us get from point A to point B without getting too lost. But then again, I never do a road trip without a paper state map open on my lap. I like to get the big picture of where we were and where we are headed. And I like to see places off our planned route that might be of interest.

Plus it's just fun to pass the miles noticing some of the cities and towns nearby....and trying to pronounce them. Or trying to figure out just where the name originated in the first place. In Maine we found some good examples! Who founded Meddybemps? Passadumkeag is an Indian word I assume....wonder what it means? You'll find North Vasselboro, Vasselboro and East Vasselboro right next to China! Big Lake seems pretty obvious, but Seboomook? And I assume Mr. And Mrs. Clark owned Clark's Island. Bald Porcupine Island.....what happened to the quills?

Names we found in Nova Scotia were even more challenging since many came from the original French or Gaelic settlers. Mira Gut, Fourchu, Arisaig and Digdrguash to name a few. I wish we'd driven up to Pugwash.....just sounds interesting. Culloden, Doucetteville, Shubenacadie. How would you like to have to write Middle Musquodoboit, Nova Scotia, Canada every time you had to write down your address? The list goes on!

Names like Glengarry, Cornwall and New Glasgow were probably named in remembrance of places left behind. Cape George, Hazel Hill, Margaretsville....named for a loved one?

Anyway....the GPS guides us along saying "when possible make a legal u-turn" because somehow we've wandered off the track. The GPS Lady doesn't know what she's missing!

Universal Problems......

As we've traveled through Canada's maritime provinces we sometimes found one or two TV channels   or listened to local radio. Turns out we entered Canada about four days before the elections for a new prime minister to serve New Bruswick.

It was interesting to listen to the Canadian talking heads discuss the candidates. The Conservatives vs the Liberals. The answers the candidates themselves presented to address the problems in this area. Not enough jobs, concerns about industries coming into the area, needs for change in the healthcare system.

Last night we had a nice long chat with the owner of our last Canadian campground. His complaints had to do with high taxes. We also touched on the high cost of gas....about $5.00 per gallon up here!

Sound familiar?

I guess there are no magic answers for any of us......some 2014 problems are universal. And it seems no one has any real solutions. Guess we will all just have to keep trying.....

Nightmares.....

Last night was a long one. I'm not sure why, but I woke myself up several times in the middle of some very frightening nightmares. Maybe I had too many covers, maybe it was something I ate, maybe it was the news of the day.

We have been mostly out-of-touch on an RV trip to Nova Scotia. We've been gone two weeks, and had very little contact with the outside world for about a week....and the radio news we did pick up was mostly about the race for Prime Minister here in the province. But I think I understand that the US and several other countries are bombing the hell out of ISIS.

My toss-and-turn nightmare had to do with multiple bombs falling onto multiple targets. And each time we obliterated one ISIS combatant, five or six others popped up from holes in the ground. Each was basically a head, swathed in black cloth with just eyes showing.....just like the image of the ISIS fighter who beheaded the American reporters. A chilling, dead-eye-stare head popping up....more and more as the bombs dropped. I honestly woke up with my heart pounding.....and then it turned into a "day-mare" as I lay there trying to go back to sleep. The images just kept playing out.....over and over in my brain.

And my thoughts spun off from there. The memory of then President Bush standing on an aircraft carrier after we'd bombed Iraq, declaring "victory". (Just slightly premature.) News stories of "boots on the ground". The image of President Obama and his advisors the night they actually got Osama bin Laden.....and knowing his body was somewhere in an ocean. (Somehow getting rid of him, although providing perhaps a little pay-back for 911, didn't change much of anything.) More news stories how many years later of "drawing down the troops" because the Iraq army was now ready to take control of their own country's needs. And then ISIS and the Iraqi army fleeing in front of the assault.

And now we drop bombs.....and there are a few comments starting about needing "boots on the ground" or "advisors". History repeating itself. A knowledgeable friend who happens to live in Japan posted a comment on her Facebook page saying the U.S. was once again playing "whack a mole". I remember that kids game. I seem to remember it was almost un-winnable.

Whack a mole.......maybe her comment was the foundation of my nightmare. Our collective nightmare.

My Brain Doesn't Work That Way....

Problems:

1. Math was, sadly, NEVER my strong suit.
2. I never learned or understood the metric system.
3. We've crossed the border into Canada.
4. They USE the metric system.
5. Speed limit sign saying 80 does NOT mean you can go 80mph.

I am slowly getting the hang of this......80 is the new 50. The km/h info IS on our speedometer but it's in very small print so hard for me to read while also trying to decipher some pretty unusual road signs in order to get us from one destination to another. It SORT of adds to the fun of traveling....then again, trying to figure out a mystery sign as you whiz by at 50mph is a challenge.

And 24 degrees does NOT mean we need to break out the parkas.

Canadian Commercials......

OK....we like to watch TV. I admit that......and I also admit we don't have cable. We still use an antenna and still seem to get plenty of choices. I also admit that we HATE to watch the commercials and wish we could fast-forward through them.

Camping last night we were able to get one Canadian channel. Some good shows....but actually we were so taken by the difference in commercials! Up here they are FUN and almost positive. We've seen commercials for Coca Cola, investment advisors, life insurance and a FEW political commercials because the provincial elections are apparently in two days.

But ZERO ads for any kind of prescription drugs with all of the warnings. NOT ONE! No warnings about all the possible life-threatening side effects for your cholesterol drugs, or your antacids, or anything else. It is so absolutely refreshing! We LOVE their commercials!!!

What can we do to get this kind of advertising to come cross the border!?

:-)

Democracy Can Be Messy .... Troubling Times

 

There was a post on my Facebook page recently. Rather disturbing. I don’t know who posted it in the first place but the request was that we all pass it on.

The photograph showed a man working (not his face, but his back). He was wearing a t-shirt and the Facebook post indicated that the logo on the back of the t-shirt indicated that the wearer was a member of ISIS. And that “they are here in America” everyone – beware.

I don’t know how to fact check this, but it won’t surprise me if the post is correct. ISIS is here. Why wouldn’t it be?

America was founded on principals that included freedom of speech, freedom of religion, freedom of assembly. But this idea of democracy is becoming more and more troubling in our modern world. Do we allow freedom of speech only if we agree with what the speaker is saying? Do we allow freedom of religion only if the beliefs echo ours? Do we allow freedom of assembly only if the person belongs to groups supporting American ideals? How messy…..how complicated……how frightening.

How much easier it would be if we lived in a police state. Someone comes to work wearing a t-shirt with a slogan we don’t approve of….call the police, he is taken in, locked up…..throw away the key. But is that America?

I admit that I am frightened. I wish I felt more optimistic. I wish there was an easy answer….but I fear there is not. Ideology spreads, anger ferments, the haves and the have-nots grow ever farther apart. Unrest in one part of the world spreads quickly…..we are connected instantly, thanks to social media and ever-changing-technology. Borders seem almost obsolete.

I hope we never see another 911…….but I fear that we will. Or we will see something worse. The bridges that connect us are weakening….the chasms that divide us deepening.

I don’t have an answer….do you?

Beginnings.....

Saturday we attended a wedding.

A lovely beginning for a bride and groom about to start this adventure called marriage.

We've known the groom since he was in diapers and he is our godson. He is a kind, thoughtful, funny, loving man and deserves nothing but happiness with his new wife. We don't know his wife well (yet!) but she seems like a wonderful woman. And judging by her father's toast at the reception, she is an exceptional and accomplished individual.....and will make a loving life-partner for Jason.

There is always something happy and exciting about a wedding - the "newness" of it all. While at the reception we sat at a table with a couple we haven't seen in almost 20 years. It was fun to re-connect. At one point, Doug asked me why I thought Dave and I were still married after 46 years. Seems these long marriages are not that common anymore. I gave him some silly answer, but have been thinking about his question ever since.

And my final response is "I really don't know!" We met in college, married mid-way through our senior year, graduated, had our first child 13 months after our wedding day and then.....day by day....year by year....we just built a marriage. I know that there were days/weeks/months and perhaps even longer periods of time where I wondered "what the heck IS this....and I don't want to continue THIS for another 20 years". Then that rough patch would pass and I'd look back and wonder...."What was that all about?"

One reason we are still together is that Dave continued to love me and support me....even when I was not very loveable. And then the reverse would occur...and I would be there for him. It's what we did, year after year, until here we are....46 years and counting!

So to my dear godson and his new bride....may you have many happy years together. We wish you laughter and joy. We wish you strength for the times you need to dig deep and support one another.....and there will be those times.  We wish you adventure! We wish you many, many years together so that someday you will page through your wedding photos and say "Look who we were! And look who we've become together!"

Cheers.....here's to YOU!

Remembering…..

It was September 2001 and we were living aboard out sailboat, Connemara. As fall approached we were moving down from Maine and back toward the Chesapeake Bay. We'd had some wonderful weather, lovely anchorages, fun explorations of coastal communities. As we followed the geese south-ish we were so enjoying this live-aboard adventure!

On the 10th we had one of the best sails of the trip, then motored through the Cape Cod Canal and anchored in Onset Bay for the night. On September 11th we had breakfast, watched a little bit of The Today Show before pulling the anchor and taking off - it must have been about 7:45 or so in the morning. The day was absolutely perfect, blue skies, a perfect wind….Connemara moved gracefully through the water. It was the kind of sail that every sailor dreams about. Hour after hour of wonderful conditions. We were gradually heading toward the East River and NYC…..my sister and niece were going to fly in, meet us and travel along for a couple of days. Life was good.

We dropped anchor in Apponoganset Bay, South Dartmouth, Massachusetts about 3:00 and Dave jumped in the dinghy to go to town for a few provisions. I lay on the settee enjoying my book.

He came back quickly. We turned on our small television and watched over and over - the Twin Towers were gone. We were stunned.

Today is the 13th anniversary of this horrible event. A remembrance of the day Americans no longer felt safe. The day we all realized that big oceans on either side of our country did not cushion us or protect us from anything. The day any false sense of security was wiped out within a matter of hours.

It's a day that everyone remembers - and knows just where they were and what they were doing as the planes hit in NY, Washington DC and Pennsylvania.

We were sailing on Narragansett Bay.

Bad Rock and Roll…..

I am a child of rock and roll. I grew up in the 50's and 60's and can remember my father saying "You call that music?" It was the early days of a new kind of music - and I loved it all. Rock and roll followed me through high school and four years of college.

Now, a bit older, I listen to a wider selection of music. Usually, in fact, if not NPR it's the country radio station. But today I am listening to rock and roll….bad rock and roll.

There is a free picnic and concert in Veteran's Park just outside our deck. We usually love sitting on the deck looking at Lake Michigan or watching the activity in the park. There always seems to be something going on. Today is a free picnic and concert sponsored by a local church. There are games and a bouncy house for the kids, free food and perhaps some conversation for the parents and adults who attend.

But talking would be difficult. The band seems to feel that they can make up for lack of musical talent by really banging on the drums and singing everything at the loudest possible level.

The event runs from 2:00 - 7:00 and it is now 4:00 so we are about half-way through.

I think I'll take Fenway for a walk and head south.

Bringing Connemara Home…..

Yesterday we brought our sailboat up from our slip in Milwaukee to our new home in Port Washington. We've been frustrated this summer, Connemara was ready to go but we never found the time to go….anywhere! Of course we didn't expect to move this summer so I guess that's one excuse. And now we've run out of time and sailing season.

But at least we got to bring her home. Too bad we couldn't sail - it was a flat Lake Michigan, no wind day. On the one hand that is good….no challenges to face on our first time out this year (or rather first time in several years due to delayed repairs at the boat yard). So we motored all the way.

It was a beautiful day - blue sky with small puffy white clouds, the rhythm of the boat moving through the water, the sound of the wake slapping our dinghy towed behind. Familiar sounds and sights from the lucky years we did spend sailing and then living on our other Connemara. My time at the helm brought back many lovely memories of moving slowly from one destination to another…water all around.

Then again, as I looked out at the expanse of blue surrounding us, I found myself hoping to catch a glimpse of a friendly dolphin or pelican's flying by (oops…wrong body of water). I did see a few seagulls and a couple of ducks. Suddenly there were two barn swallows swooping around the deck and then east toward Michigan. Then there was another small bird flapping about the boat, swooping close to the mast and in front of the dodger. It landed - no bird…it was a bat! It hung onto the foresail for a few minutes and then took off again. What a surprise! We weren't that far from shore, but still a bat? At noon? Where did it go after leaving the boat? I hope it made it back to shore and safety.

We approached Port Washington and coming into the harbor reminded me of coming into other harbors, from Maryland to North Carolina to Florida. Anchorages and small towns in the Bahamas. From the Keys to spots in New England….there is something about coming in slowly on the water side instead of driving into a community that makes everything look so different. Port Washington is Connemara's home for now - she's in a slip about two blocks from the condo. Fun to come in and see our building right there!

We'll see what next year brings.

Ear Worms and the 80% Theory…..

Some nights seem much longer than others. You know the ones….when you can't seem to shut down and fall asleep. Last night was one of those for me.

10:30 pm….I stop reading, turn out the light, turn on my side and snuggle into my pillow.

10:45 pm….I start to hear Darius Rucker's gravelly voice singing "Rock me mama like a wagon wheel, rock me mama any way you feel, ohhhhhhhhh, mama rock me." I like that song.

11:15 pm….I used to like that song….but that short chorus seems to be on re-wind. I have an ear worm rattling around in my brain. I turn over, get re-settled.

12:30 am….I must have dozed for awhile, but now I'm singing along in my head again. Why did I like that song?

Listening to NPR recently I heard half of a story about sleep studies.  The woman in charge of the research said that adults need seven to eight hours of sleep each night. But if you can't sleep, resting with your eyes closed gives about 80% of the benefits of a full night's real sleep. So….I will relax with my eyes closed….deep breathing…..quiet my mind.

1:45 am….I am going to stop looking at the clock and I swear I am going to stop singing that damn song.

2:30 am….80% must be better than nothing.

3:10 am….who invented the term "ear worm" and why can't I get this one out of my ear? Why that particular chorus?

6:30 am….I wake up. So I did get a few hours of regular sleep, and a few hours of resting at hopefully 80%.

Not sure how confident I am about that theory.

Yawn.

Free Library and Another Good Read….

I love the small "free library" boxes that are popping up all over. I found about ten near our house in Bay View and so far I've discovered three here near our condo in Port Washington. The other day I stopped at one and picked up Then Again by Diane Keaton. And I loved it.

A fascinating memoir, with very interesting "voices"….but that's what I would expect from this unique and "quirky" actress. Diane examines family, and love, and commitment…and life. There were many quotes or passages that really made me pause and think. Including:

• "She (Diane's mother) knew one thing: It all boils down to family. One day you end up having spent your life with a handful of people. I did. I have a family….three, if you think about it. There are my siblings, and there are my children, but I also have an extended family. The people who stayed. The people who became more than friends; the people who open the door when I knock. That's what it all boils down to. The people who have to open the door, not because they always want to but because they do."
• As Diane went home to tell her children that her mother was dead she told them "Grammy had a good ending…..I told them I didn't know the exact moment Grammy passed away because I was distracted by the sudden sound of flapping wings. I looked outside and there in the dark was a swarm of seagulls standing on the deck, as if they were trying to say goodbye to the nice lady who used to throw bread crumbs on the seawall's deck….When I turned back I knew I was in the presence of a miracle….The same brown eyes that had been closed for seven long days and seven long nights were open. Wide open. I asked Dexter and Duke (Diane's children) if they thought their grandmother might have been seeing something she'd never seen before. They both agreed she must have been looking into something on the other side of new." What a lovely thought….the other side of new.

And at the end of the book there was a discussion/interview between Anna Quindlen and Diane. Diane quotes Henry James: "Three things in human life are important; the first is to be kind; the second is to be kind; and the third is to be kind." I'll try to remember that on a daily basis.

Anna and Diane talk about losing their mothers, and being worried about leaving their children "too soon". Anna says: "Sometimes I say to my kids, it's like the end of E.T. when E.T. puts his finger out and touches Elliott's forehead and says, 'I'll be right here.' That's what I think happens with a good and present mother, even if she has to leave a little sooner than she ought - that's she's right there."

And the last was a question in the reader's guide for the book. The question had to do with one of Diane's early childhood memories that might have guided her toward her life in the performing arts. The question asks "What childhood memories have greatly influenced your life or now stand out as significant?" And a picture flashed into my brain. 

I am about six or seven and taking a bath. My mom is sitting on the toilet (it's closed)! She is reading out loud from Winnie the Pooh and we are both laughing so hard! Some silly Pooh-ism no doubt. But now I wonder….this "small" mother act of reading out loud to me….is it one of the reasons that I now cannot go through a day without a book at my side? 

I like to think maybe…..at least partly…..that's one of the reasons.