A beautiful evening to sit on our little deck, read a book and glance up at Lake Michigan once in awhile. A slight breeze, no bugs, the sounds of families enjoying the playground across the street echoing in the background.
I glanced up from the page just in time to see a little boy fall off one of the equipment's hanging bars and land flat on his back on the bark chips. There was silence for a few seconds and then I could hear his cries. His young father quickly gathered him up, hugged him for a bit and walked with him back to the bench along the side. I could not hear any conversation between the adventurous little guy and his parents…..but after a few minutes he was back exploring.
This is a playground designed for the younger set. There are colorful slides, some ladders, a bridge to cross….nothing too challenging, but perfect for the pre-school set. After about age five or six they probably prefer the big kid playground up on the bluff. It's a safe place….there are no swings, there are bark chips to cushion any falls, plenty of places for adults to sit and supervise. It's an adventure setting for safety minded families in 2015. Our playgrounds were a bit "rougher" growing up….with asphalt "cushions".
But this is a fun place to watch….little ones broaden their horizons, test their muscles, build their skills. Try new things, make a quick friend, chase each other and laugh going down the slide.
As I said, I couldn't hear the conversation, but I hope the little boy's parents were encouraging…saying things like "Wow…you were really hanging on tight to that bar!" "We're glad you tried!" "It's OK…everyone falls sometimes. You can try again."
It must have been something along those lines because, once again, he went back. Go little guy….go. There will be many stumbles in life….this wasn't your first and won't be the last. But you can do it.
Wonder why, looking back at the book on my lap, I suddenly had a lump in my throat and my eyes felt moist. Memories of supervising little ones who no longer need my supervision I guess….now they are all big ones!
Monday, August 31, 2015
Thursday, August 27, 2015
……Competition
The same neighbors who care for the flower garden along the fence between our condo and the bike path also take time to fill several bird feeders.
We walk by or watch from the deck and window to see lots of bird activity as the feeders empty. I'm not good at bird identification, but I know we've seen little wrens and gold finch as well as many others in the past few weeks. (These feeders seem to be squirrel proof because we've never seen one of those climb the pole.)
But the birds do have competition. I notice movement outside the window as I sit at the desk….one of our neighborhood deer steps out onto the bike path. It walks north and over the grass for a quick stop and a snack. Who says this is just for the birds?? A little munch and then he/she moved on up the path.
No sooner had I put my camera away and gone back to the desk when there was more movement outside. Three more of our resident "herd" popped out of the trees, but they didn't stop. They slowly walked past the birdfeeders and on up the bike path.
I'm sure it's frustrating for the bird-seed-fillers…..but it was fun to see. Maybe I'll offer to buy a bag of birdseed to keep the feeders full for whatever wants to stop for a snack.
We walk by or watch from the deck and window to see lots of bird activity as the feeders empty. I'm not good at bird identification, but I know we've seen little wrens and gold finch as well as many others in the past few weeks. (These feeders seem to be squirrel proof because we've never seen one of those climb the pole.)
But the birds do have competition. I notice movement outside the window as I sit at the desk….one of our neighborhood deer steps out onto the bike path. It walks north and over the grass for a quick stop and a snack. Who says this is just for the birds?? A little munch and then he/she moved on up the path.
No sooner had I put my camera away and gone back to the desk when there was more movement outside. Three more of our resident "herd" popped out of the trees, but they didn't stop. They slowly walked past the birdfeeders and on up the bike path.
I'm sure it's frustrating for the bird-seed-fillers…..but it was fun to see. Maybe I'll offer to buy a bag of birdseed to keep the feeders full for whatever wants to stop for a snack.
Saturday, August 22, 2015
Blooms, Bees and Watching Fenway's Butt…..
Fenway is a good condo dog. He has a routine we can count on. Wakes us up about 7:00 a.m. and we take the elevator down and go out for a quick walk. Back for breakfast (first favorite meal of the day). Then mess around, nap, stare at us, play with a toy, nap….and go for a longer walk. Then another nap or playtime, more staring at us…..early bird special "dinner" about 3:30 (second favorite meal of the day) and another walk. Evenings are spent playing toss and run and growl with a toy before curling up on the couch under a quilt while we sit and watch TV. Last walk about 10:00 p.m. and down for the night. So….he's good guy to have in a small space.
But sometimes I think he does miss his easy access to our fenced yard back in Bay View. When I take him out for a walk he heads toward the nearest bench and flops down on the grass in the sun. Bakes one side, while I sit and watch, then rolls around on his back and flips to the other side. After about ten minutes he's "done" and off we go.
Yesterday, while sitting on the bench outside our condo I was happily watching lots of bees buzzing around the blooms along the fence. (A condo neighbor does a wonderful job of planting and caring for all of these flowers.) There must have been twenty bumble bees and other bees going from bloom to bloom. August is a busy bee time in Wisconsin.
Then I glanced down at Fen….quietly napping in the grass. He was right next to three clover blossoms and one big yellow dandelion was growing up right behind his butt. Each of the blooms had a busy bee on top. I tightened his leash without disturbing him.
Wouldn't that be a rude awakening! Happily roll onto your back….wave your legs in the air for a minute or two….and then turn over on top of a busy and now very distressed bee. Not a good way to enjoy your time outside.
So now, at least for a few weeks, I get to enjoy the blooms, watch the bees…..and keep an eye on Fenway's butt. He's worth it.
But sometimes I think he does miss his easy access to our fenced yard back in Bay View. When I take him out for a walk he heads toward the nearest bench and flops down on the grass in the sun. Bakes one side, while I sit and watch, then rolls around on his back and flips to the other side. After about ten minutes he's "done" and off we go.
Yesterday, while sitting on the bench outside our condo I was happily watching lots of bees buzzing around the blooms along the fence. (A condo neighbor does a wonderful job of planting and caring for all of these flowers.) There must have been twenty bumble bees and other bees going from bloom to bloom. August is a busy bee time in Wisconsin.
Then I glanced down at Fen….quietly napping in the grass. He was right next to three clover blossoms and one big yellow dandelion was growing up right behind his butt. Each of the blooms had a busy bee on top. I tightened his leash without disturbing him.
Wouldn't that be a rude awakening! Happily roll onto your back….wave your legs in the air for a minute or two….and then turn over on top of a busy and now very distressed bee. Not a good way to enjoy your time outside.
So now, at least for a few weeks, I get to enjoy the blooms, watch the bees…..and keep an eye on Fenway's butt. He's worth it.
Friday, August 21, 2015
Four Letter Words……
We've entered another election cycle….for the forseeable future we will be listening to radio commercial and even more fun, we will be watching TV commercials. Then there are the debates. And the newspaper coverage. And postings on Facebook (and yes, sometimes I pass them on or respond.) And the internet. Election coverage and talking heads will be everywhere.
Listening to NPR in the car yesterday and it seems Canada is also having a major election. I think the commentator indicated that this was an especially long run up to the voting booth - eleven weeks. And a few years back we were in Ireland and there were signs everywhere…..again, for only a matter of weeks before the Presidential election was decided. (And Michael D. won!)
So I have to wonder…..why does it take us so long? Why do candidates start sometimes two years before the election? And why do incumbents also spend so much of their time running for re-election?
And I also have to wonder why we all seem to judge each other based on who we voted for in the last election? Since when have Republican, Democrat, liberal, conservative, right-wing, left-wing all become four letter words. Why do conversations simply shut down when people who disagree on a candidate try to have a discussion? Why can't we have the conversations, explain our reasoning….perhaps even change our minds? Why is it all so nasty…..and so long?
Sigh….I will be in the voting booth and I will make a decision. I admit I'm not listening too much right now….there's just too much noise…..too many people in the mix. This process in the USA is just too damn long (and yes….that's a four letter word).
Listening to NPR in the car yesterday and it seems Canada is also having a major election. I think the commentator indicated that this was an especially long run up to the voting booth - eleven weeks. And a few years back we were in Ireland and there were signs everywhere…..again, for only a matter of weeks before the Presidential election was decided. (And Michael D. won!)
So I have to wonder…..why does it take us so long? Why do candidates start sometimes two years before the election? And why do incumbents also spend so much of their time running for re-election?
And I also have to wonder why we all seem to judge each other based on who we voted for in the last election? Since when have Republican, Democrat, liberal, conservative, right-wing, left-wing all become four letter words. Why do conversations simply shut down when people who disagree on a candidate try to have a discussion? Why can't we have the conversations, explain our reasoning….perhaps even change our minds? Why is it all so nasty…..and so long?
Sigh….I will be in the voting booth and I will make a decision. I admit I'm not listening too much right now….there's just too much noise…..too many people in the mix. This process in the USA is just too damn long (and yes….that's a four letter word).
Wednesday, August 19, 2015
A Pile of Pieces…..
Quilts percolate in my brain until they are ready to come out. Occasionally a pattern will prompt an idea, or a stack of fabric that goes well together. Sometimes it's just a concept without a pattern….and sometimes the end result is deemed a success….sometimes not.
But it's the process I enjoy the most. Maybe it's an off-shoot of the fact that I loved geometry in high school…..shapes and pieces put together to make the whole. Is that a right-brain or left-brain activity? (Whichever side is the one that does not involve algebra because I needed a tutor to get through that class.)
Anyway - I purchased most of these fabrics at Paducah during quilt week last year. I just loved the palette. And they sat in my stash cupboard until recently. They moved out to my counter top and are now starting to "make something".
After a few days they move to the design wall tucked into what used to be a walk-in pantry. (It now belongs to me! No food - just fabric, my sewing machine and other quilting supplies. Works fine for us since I hate to cook….but love to quilt.)
Eventually the finished quilt will decorate our bedroom. I recently made a similar quilt and frankly Dave was disappointed to see that it was leaving the condo and heading to the Seattle area to help a non-profit raise funds with a raffle. But I assured him there was enough left for quilt number two…..and we will keep this one.
Love the fabric shoping, love the planning, love the process, love the results. Color me happy.
But it's the process I enjoy the most. Maybe it's an off-shoot of the fact that I loved geometry in high school…..shapes and pieces put together to make the whole. Is that a right-brain or left-brain activity? (Whichever side is the one that does not involve algebra because I needed a tutor to get through that class.)
Anyway - I purchased most of these fabrics at Paducah during quilt week last year. I just loved the palette. And they sat in my stash cupboard until recently. They moved out to my counter top and are now starting to "make something".
After a few days they move to the design wall tucked into what used to be a walk-in pantry. (It now belongs to me! No food - just fabric, my sewing machine and other quilting supplies. Works fine for us since I hate to cook….but love to quilt.)
Eventually the finished quilt will decorate our bedroom. I recently made a similar quilt and frankly Dave was disappointed to see that it was leaving the condo and heading to the Seattle area to help a non-profit raise funds with a raffle. But I assured him there was enough left for quilt number two…..and we will keep this one.
Love the fabric shoping, love the planning, love the process, love the results. Color me happy.
Sunday, August 16, 2015
FWP.......
Earlier this month Dave and I treated the "kids" and their families to an Alaskan cruise. There were ten of us....with four grandsons ranging in age from ten to 17. Two mothers and two fathers.....with different interests, and two "oldies" with their own wish-lists.
I guess our biggest "wish" was just that we would enjoy the time together.....anything else would be a
bonus. As with most trips or vacations there were a few "bumps".....starting in Milwaukee when our plane was delayed and we flew out two hours late.
Sometimes we were frustrated on our huge cruise ship just trying to FIND each other.....and at moments the two younger families sharing one cabin each felt a bit "crowded"! The food wasn't to everyone's liking.....and frankly the coffee in the buffet was really weak....and we had some rain that dampened a few of our excursions.
But....Dave and I went snorkeling in Alaska! The kids did some sea kayaking, some rock climbing, visited a glacier, got personal with a number of wild animals at an animal rescue park...including a huge moose! We played Scrabble and Monopoly together, had some fabulous meals in the ship's dining rooms, swam in the pools and sat in the hot tubs. We sat on deck and talked. Since we are spread from Wisconsin to Washington State this doesn't happen often enough! And the dessert selection was amazing.
Our steward took care of our rooms each day, we didn't have to cook a darn thing all week, we got to spot whales and seals and just stare at the amazing ocean.
So the fact that we "suffered" a few bumps pales in comparison to all the good things that we enjoyed. As Megan said (quoting a comedian) .... we were complaining about First World Problems. Really not problems at all. On a scale of one to ten they are not even on the list.......
Except Meg just texted me to say their flight was delayed for who knows how long in Seattle. The escape chute deployed by mistake! They were sure to miss their connection in Dallas. Crap.....sorry, but that is a pretty frustrating FWP!
I guess our biggest "wish" was just that we would enjoy the time together.....anything else would be a
bonus. As with most trips or vacations there were a few "bumps".....starting in Milwaukee when our plane was delayed and we flew out two hours late.
Sometimes we were frustrated on our huge cruise ship just trying to FIND each other.....and at moments the two younger families sharing one cabin each felt a bit "crowded"! The food wasn't to everyone's liking.....and frankly the coffee in the buffet was really weak....and we had some rain that dampened a few of our excursions.
But....Dave and I went snorkeling in Alaska! The kids did some sea kayaking, some rock climbing, visited a glacier, got personal with a number of wild animals at an animal rescue park...including a huge moose! We played Scrabble and Monopoly together, had some fabulous meals in the ship's dining rooms, swam in the pools and sat in the hot tubs. We sat on deck and talked. Since we are spread from Wisconsin to Washington State this doesn't happen often enough! And the dessert selection was amazing.
Our steward took care of our rooms each day, we didn't have to cook a darn thing all week, we got to spot whales and seals and just stare at the amazing ocean.
So the fact that we "suffered" a few bumps pales in comparison to all the good things that we enjoyed. As Megan said (quoting a comedian) .... we were complaining about First World Problems. Really not problems at all. On a scale of one to ten they are not even on the list.......
Except Meg just texted me to say their flight was delayed for who knows how long in Seattle. The escape chute deployed by mistake! They were sure to miss their connection in Dallas. Crap.....sorry, but that is a pretty frustrating FWP!
Sunday, August 9, 2015
Out of Control…..
Driving along on our last RV trip out West we were, as always, taken by the beautiful scenery and jaw-dropping vistas unfolding as we moved state to state. Wisconsin has its own beauty but we don't have canyons and we don't have mountains. Mountains and canyons bring another level to roadside scenery.
Driving curving roads up and down mountains adds another level of excitement (or should I say TENSION!) to the trip. But we love it out there and hopefully will go west-ish again before too long.
One thing we noticed were the runaway truck ramps. We've seen these before, but never paid much attention. But driving the RV down the road and keeping her under control I became more aware of just how important the brakes are. And what if they fail!???
Good grief……if you were a trucker and your brakes failed I know you'd be glad to see this sign and the gravel up-grade just ahead. But just driving past this was scary enough for me! I could see how the bed of gravel would slow and then stop the truck….but then what??? How do you get back down??
Maybe driving around flatter Wisconsin most of the year is excitement enough.
Driving curving roads up and down mountains adds another level of excitement (or should I say TENSION!) to the trip. But we love it out there and hopefully will go west-ish again before too long.
One thing we noticed were the runaway truck ramps. We've seen these before, but never paid much attention. But driving the RV down the road and keeping her under control I became more aware of just how important the brakes are. And what if they fail!???
Good grief……if you were a trucker and your brakes failed I know you'd be glad to see this sign and the gravel up-grade just ahead. But just driving past this was scary enough for me! I could see how the bed of gravel would slow and then stop the truck….but then what??? How do you get back down??
Maybe driving around flatter Wisconsin most of the year is excitement enough.
Friday, August 7, 2015
Being Mortal…...
I've just finished reading a very good, thoughtful book. Being Mortal: Medicine and What Matters In the End by Atul Gawande. Written by a physician it really brings into focus how our society and our medical community treats people, no matter what age, as they approach the end of life. Most of the book focused on health care for the elderly, and how it fails…..but not every example involved someone who had enjoyed a good long life. Some were sadder stories of lives cut short, young families left behind.
Every chapter, no I take that back….every page gave me pause and something to think about. Of course working for hospice also provided me with many opportunities to examine what I thought about what I wanted at the end of my journey….but thinking about it in the abstract and actually facing the dying process are certainly two very different things. My thoughts about my wishes are still a work in progress.
Many of Dr. Gawande's quotes made me stop and think. "People with serous illness have priorities besides simply prolonging their lives. Surveys find that their top concerns include avoiding suffering, strengthening relationships with family and friends, being mentally aware, not being a burden on others, and achieving a sense that their life is complete."
"The only way death is not meaningless is to see yourself as part of something greater: a family, a community, a society. If you don't, mortality is just a horror. But if you do, it is not." Later he goes on to state: "We become less interested in the rewards of achieving and accumulating, and more interested in the rewards of simply being. Yet while we may feel less ambitious, we also become concerned for our legacy. And we have a deep need to identify purposes outside ourselves that make living feel meaningful and worthwhile."
I remember training our hospice volunteers and reminding them that each of our patients wanted and needed to know that they mattered that they'd made a difference in the world. Maybe in a very "small" way by raising a family (after all…..most of us do operate on a pretty small stage)…but they mattered to those that loved them, to their neighbors, to their communities. They made a difference while they were in the world.
A sad conclusion of the book is that most physicians are simply not asking their patients the right questions. Instead of offering yet another round of medication/treatment/surgery doctors should be asking "What matters most to you?" Patients usually don't realize they may have choices and those choices would make their last months/weeks/days more comfortable and allow them to live life to the fullest as they say goodbye.
"Being mortal is about the struggle to cope with the constraints of our biology, with the limits set by genes and cells and flesh and bone. Medical science has given us remarkable power to push against these limits…..But again and again, I have seen the damage we in medicine do when we fail to acknowledge that such power is finite and always will be……We've been wrong about what our job is in medicine. We think our job is to ensure health and survival. But really it is larger than that. It is to enable well-being. And well-being is about the reasons one wishes to be alive."
So much to consider…..such important converations to have with those we love. I'm healthy and expect to enjoy many more years….but hospice also taught me you never know what's just around the corner. So what are my wishes…..what will my legacy be?
Food for thought. Look for the book. Please read it and maybe buy a copy for your doctor?
Every chapter, no I take that back….every page gave me pause and something to think about. Of course working for hospice also provided me with many opportunities to examine what I thought about what I wanted at the end of my journey….but thinking about it in the abstract and actually facing the dying process are certainly two very different things. My thoughts about my wishes are still a work in progress.
Many of Dr. Gawande's quotes made me stop and think. "People with serous illness have priorities besides simply prolonging their lives. Surveys find that their top concerns include avoiding suffering, strengthening relationships with family and friends, being mentally aware, not being a burden on others, and achieving a sense that their life is complete."
"The only way death is not meaningless is to see yourself as part of something greater: a family, a community, a society. If you don't, mortality is just a horror. But if you do, it is not." Later he goes on to state: "We become less interested in the rewards of achieving and accumulating, and more interested in the rewards of simply being. Yet while we may feel less ambitious, we also become concerned for our legacy. And we have a deep need to identify purposes outside ourselves that make living feel meaningful and worthwhile."
I remember training our hospice volunteers and reminding them that each of our patients wanted and needed to know that they mattered that they'd made a difference in the world. Maybe in a very "small" way by raising a family (after all…..most of us do operate on a pretty small stage)…but they mattered to those that loved them, to their neighbors, to their communities. They made a difference while they were in the world.
A sad conclusion of the book is that most physicians are simply not asking their patients the right questions. Instead of offering yet another round of medication/treatment/surgery doctors should be asking "What matters most to you?" Patients usually don't realize they may have choices and those choices would make their last months/weeks/days more comfortable and allow them to live life to the fullest as they say goodbye.
"Being mortal is about the struggle to cope with the constraints of our biology, with the limits set by genes and cells and flesh and bone. Medical science has given us remarkable power to push against these limits…..But again and again, I have seen the damage we in medicine do when we fail to acknowledge that such power is finite and always will be……We've been wrong about what our job is in medicine. We think our job is to ensure health and survival. But really it is larger than that. It is to enable well-being. And well-being is about the reasons one wishes to be alive."
So much to consider…..such important converations to have with those we love. I'm healthy and expect to enjoy many more years….but hospice also taught me you never know what's just around the corner. So what are my wishes…..what will my legacy be?
Food for thought. Look for the book. Please read it and maybe buy a copy for your doctor?
Thursday, August 6, 2015
Carry On……
We are looking forward to a family adventure - our bunch is headed to Alaska for a one-week cruise. It should really be a lot of fun…..and give us some time to gather together. We don't get many chances to do that since we are spread from Washington State to Wisconsin and parents are working and grandkids are very busy with school and extra-curricular stuff. The four cousins range in age from ten to 17 and have a wide variety of interests, so we thought taking them on a big cruise ship would give everyone plenty of opportunity to find things to do that they like to do.
Of course the ship is really huge….so if kids or grandkids want to "get away" from the grandparents it won't be too difficult!
Anyway - we are packing and sorting and unpacking re-packing and figuring out what to bring. Dave and I each pack one small carry-on suitcase. And the restrictions keep making our suitcases "shrink" and then "shrink" again. But since we hate to check our luggage we've learned to travel really light. As Dave says…..he's the only one who knows I've worn the same t-shirt four times in one week. (Uh well….this trip a few more people might notice.)
Well I'll just put in an extra scarf - that's lightweight and helps me change-up my "look" for a day.
So we'll carry on…..and carry on!
Of course the ship is really huge….so if kids or grandkids want to "get away" from the grandparents it won't be too difficult!
Anyway - we are packing and sorting and unpacking re-packing and figuring out what to bring. Dave and I each pack one small carry-on suitcase. And the restrictions keep making our suitcases "shrink" and then "shrink" again. But since we hate to check our luggage we've learned to travel really light. As Dave says…..he's the only one who knows I've worn the same t-shirt four times in one week. (Uh well….this trip a few more people might notice.)
Well I'll just put in an extra scarf - that's lightweight and helps me change-up my "look" for a day.
So we'll carry on…..and carry on!
Monday, August 3, 2015
….and the Storm Passes
Wow - the cold front came through after last night's amazing storms. And temperatures dropped 20 degrees in a matter of moments. That's one thing we love about Wisconsin…..if you don't like the weather….just wait an hour!
The storm passes…..the black sky lightens a bit before sunset and we get this! Never get tired of looking out our windows.
The storm passes…..the black sky lightens a bit before sunset and we get this! Never get tired of looking out our windows.
Sunday, August 2, 2015
On the Edge…..
We've had an amazing stretch of good summer weather here in Port Washington. Wisconsin needs rain, as does so much of the country, but the past ten days have provided warm temperatures, low humidity, a nice breeze…..perfect summer weather.
And then there is a quick change this evening. Weather coming in from the northwest - moving through communities just north of us…thousands of lightening strikes…..damaging winds and hail. Warnings broadcasting on the TV and the radio. I left my sewing machine to look out the window. Looking straight up I saw cotton balls…..
Looking north I saw the storm approaching….and moving out over Lake Michigan. My first thoughts were about when we lived on our sailboat, Connemara, and how this kind of storm would have us racing for cover….trying to get to an anchorage to protect us from Mother Nature's fury.
The wind is howling outside the condo's windows…..Fenway is cowering in a corner…..we seem to be on the edge of the warnings and most of the storm will miss us.
And as I type this I catch a movement outside the window. It's our neighborhood mother doe and her two fawns. They come out onto the bike path, seem to cock their heads and twist their ears in reaction to the wind….and then run up the path and duck back into the woods. A storm is coming…..people and animals seeking cover.
Amazing how quickly things can change!
And then there is a quick change this evening. Weather coming in from the northwest - moving through communities just north of us…thousands of lightening strikes…..damaging winds and hail. Warnings broadcasting on the TV and the radio. I left my sewing machine to look out the window. Looking straight up I saw cotton balls…..
Looking north I saw the storm approaching….and moving out over Lake Michigan. My first thoughts were about when we lived on our sailboat, Connemara, and how this kind of storm would have us racing for cover….trying to get to an anchorage to protect us from Mother Nature's fury.
The wind is howling outside the condo's windows…..Fenway is cowering in a corner…..we seem to be on the edge of the warnings and most of the storm will miss us.
And as I type this I catch a movement outside the window. It's our neighborhood mother doe and her two fawns. They come out onto the bike path, seem to cock their heads and twist their ears in reaction to the wind….and then run up the path and duck back into the woods. A storm is coming…..people and animals seeking cover.
Amazing how quickly things can change!
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