Our children were born in 1969 and 1974. We learned to parent the best we could right along with the two of them learning how to child the best they could. Some days were easier than others.....but looking back, I think it was mostly positive and they certainly grew into independent adults of good conscience. And now they parent......and the world is different, harder and more complicated so their job is much more complex.
While our family life wasn't exactly Leave It To Beaver-ish, it was pretty suburban/good schools/nice friends/regular jobs/two parents/nice houses/vacations/dogs etc. We had to monitor how much time they spent watching TV, made sure homework was done, chores got checked off the list, got to bed on time.....normal parenting stuff.
We tried to educate them in the right and wrong of things, talked about sex ed and drugs, decision making, consequences for their actions and all that. And then.....before we knew it, they were off to college and on to life.
Yesterday I drove to West Bend and dropped Fenway off at our daughter's house while I went to the acupuncturist. As I came into the house I found our daughter sitting at the kitchen table having a discussion with her two boys. I did not interrupt, but I did stand and listen before leaving for my appointment.
She was slowly, calmly and thoughtfully talking about what happened in Charlottesville last weekend and the response to it. She talked to them about white supremicists, about the KKK, about hatred for others based on race or faith....and how she felt about it. She talked to them about living in their own community where people had differences of opinion and how that was OK.....but the hatred spewing out of the crowd on that college campus would never be OK.
And she tried to explain the failure of leadership demonstrated by the man who now occupies the Oval Office.....how a President's job was to lead the country and set an example and stand up for what was right and bring out the best in our citizens. And she tried to explain how this man was failing.
I'm not doing this discussion justice......she was amazing. And her boys listened quietly. And I listened sadly....and left the house to drive to my appointment. I couldn't leave the driveway for awhile because I was crying. I had to sit there and try to gather my thoughts and dry my eyes before putting the car in gear.
Never, in my wildest dreams, did I ever think that in our America our daughter would have to have this kind of discussion with her two boys.
Never.
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