And Her Name Was Debby......

I met Debby when I worked for VITAS Hospice in Milwaukee. She came to a volunteer orientation completing the classes in order to visit our patients. And she wanted to bring her dog, the golden retriever, Hairy.

Once she finished the class portion of our training she brought Hairy to the office.  I needed to see how he reacted to strangers and if he was friendly. Hairy was about two years old and was he ever friendly. In spite of going to dog-training classes, Hairy was very, very "bouncy". Friendly but bouncy.....perhaps too bouncy to visit with hospice patients requesting a Paw Pal visit. But after seeing him greet our administrative staff we took him to our inpatient unit for part two of his test. How would he react to the equipment and new sensory challenges present in a hospice setting?

Before we walked through the door, a family came out of the unit. A little girl, about eight years old and with tears in her eyes saw Hairy...ran up, dropped to her knees and hugged Hairy around the neck. He sat quietly......and loved and comforted her. His bounce disappeared. Inside the unit we visited with the staff and they all loved Hairy......including a patient sitting in a wheel chair near the desk. Instead of pulling on his leash and jumping.....Hairy walked over slowly, sat down, put his head in the man's lap and let this smiling patient pet his head. It seemed Hairy was a natural hospice volunteer.

And so was Debby. For the next few years Hairy and Debby brightened the day for families, patients and staff. He was a furry bundle of calm love and he made a difference. Debby, holding his leash, was somehow "secondary"....but she was a wonderful, kind, smiling and loving hospice volunteer.

And then I got a phone call....an aneurysm burst in Debby's brain and she was at the ICU. The doctors did all they could. But after several surgeries the decision was made to take Debby off life support.


Before doing so, her husband asked if Hairy could come. So yes, Hairy came for one last visit. Her husband told me later, that when Hairy got up on Debby's bed and lay down right next to her....all of the monitors that had been so "quiet" for hours reacted.

Heart strings stretching from Hairy to his beloved mistress, Debby. She knew he was there.

And so Debby died. In her mid 50's. She was way too young and I still miss her. I have a picture of her on my refrigerator. She is smiling, hands on hips, blue jeans and a white t-shirt with a red shirt tied around her waist. She and her husband had been hiking in California the year before she died. Her picture reminds me to enjoy the day, to think of others, to love your family, to love your pets…..to give back to your community. Debby smiles at me from my refrigerator.

I still think of her, really... every day. I still miss her.....and yet she was "just" someone I met through work. A volunteer. But she was so much more.