Fun at Camp Glendale......

We are very fortunate. We love to travel and we get to take off and explore several times each year. Sometimes it's in our small RV and Mr. Fenway gets to go along with. He loves being Camper Boy because it means he can sleep with us. But then again, sometimes we plan a trip that includes a flight or a location where bringing our dog would be problematic if not impossible. So then he can stay at our daughter's house where he can play with cousin Sadie and hide all of her toys.

If that doesn't work, he gets to go to "Camp Glendale". As I said, we are fortunate....and having good friends who love to have Fenway come to visit is part of that good fortune. Our friends have three big dogs of their own, but our littler guy fits right in. And he loves it. A big fenced in yard. New toys. Three friends to chase or nap with. It's dog heaven. He's even had the chance to jump into Evan and Sam's big RV and go off to dog shows (as a viewer, not a participant).

Of course camp can have it's downside. Once he got to go boating on the Milwaukee River and promptly fell overboard.....he can swim! And sometimes our friends dress him with silly hats (hard for such a sophisticated gentleman).

But we love to have him spend time at camp because he comes home so tired that he sleeps for days. And, at this point, after so many years of never having to go to a kennel, he is spoiled by all the attention he enjoys at camp. (He often gets a "Spa Day" that includes, bath, toenail trimming and tooth brushing!)

So this is Fenway's "toast" to Camp Glendale. The best place for a dog to stay....if he can't go along on an adventure.

Worst Weather Ever.....

It's been a very strange December. Much warmer than normal.....several days in the 50's. Needless to say we did not have a white Christmas. On the one hand this is sort of disappointing for us hardy Wisconsinites - it's difficult to feel "holiday-ish" when it's this warm and everything outside is still green, or brown, or grey. On the other hand, it made our trips to West Bend and then down to Chicago much easier than driving on slippery roads.

Then came the 28th. In one day I think Mother Nature made up for the month.  We've had high winds blowing snow, sleet and freezing rain. Roads and highways are closed down, car accidents everywhere.....warnings on TV telling people to stay at home unless absolutely necessary. We've been in the condo all day listening to the wind howl around our windows. Dave skipped playing pool at the senior center and refused to go to the grocery store. I'm glad we live on the west side of the building because I can't help but think that the heaters for the units on the east side are working overtime.

Fenway did get out early this morning before all this awfulness started....and one quick pee since then. His eyeballs are starting to turn yellow, but there is NO way he will even come close to use for his leash, never mind get in the elevator and go down to go outside. It could be a long night.

I've been busy working on a quilt top and reading a book. Now time to fix dinner....and settle in for the night. I'm hoping it's a little better tomorrow. It will be our 48th anniversary and we have dinner reservations at a very nice restaurant.

But if this continues, it's scrambled eggs by candlelight.

Favorite Quotes.....

For years I've been keeping an on-going word document....a list of favorite quotes. Usually it is a sentence I run across while reading a book or even the lyrics from a country song. I opened an email this morning and found an interview with Cheryl Strayed and added another to my growing list.

She said, "Most things will be okay eventually, but not everything will be. Sometimes you'll put up a good fight and lose. Sometimes you'll hold on really hard and realize there is no choice but to let go. Acceptance is a small, quiet room." I know why this quote meant something special to me today....and it prompted me to go back to my list and find a few others.

"There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."- Albert Einstein

"This is my simple religion. There is no need for temples; no need for complicated philosophy. Our own brain, our own heart is our temple, the philosophy is kindness." - His Holiness the 14th Dalai Lama

"I have survived so much loss, as all of us have in our fourties. My parents, my dear friends, my pets. Rubble is the ground on which our deepest friendships are built......the bad news is that you will never completely get over the loss of that beloved person. But this is also the good news. They live forever in your broken heart that doesn't seal back up. And you come through. It's like having a broken leg that never heals perfectly - that still hurts when the weather is cold - but you learn to dance with the limp. You dance to the absurdities of life; you dance to the minuet of old friendships." - Anne Lamont

"Cause love only comes
Once in awhile
And knocks on your door
And throws you a smile

And takes every breath
Leaves every scar
Speaks through your soul
And sings to your heart...." - Lady Antebellum - Charles Kelley, Richard Belmont Powell and Anna Wilson

"What I want more than ever is to appreciate that I have this day, and tomorrow and hopefully days beyond that. I am experiencing the learning curve of gratitude." - Mary Chapin Carpenter

I love when a sentence jumps off a page and hits me right between the eyes....the sentence that says "re-read me". So I do. And I add them to my collection. Authors that capture and express thoughts much more eloquently than I ever could.

Trying to Compartmentalize....

I'm trying to divide my thoughts into "sections" in my brain. Trying to live in the moment and not worry too much about tomorrow. Trying to enjoy each day for what it is....another new day.

A dear friend reminded me of this process.....and it's how she gets through her days. Frankly, she is dying. She's had almost two good years since her diagnosis. Time at home, time traveling with her husband, time visiting her kids and grandkids, time in her garden, time to attend her art class, time for movies, time to work on her watercolor paintings, time to walk her dogs to the mailbox almost every morning, time to spend with friends, time to laugh. Time to watch sunrises and sunsets, to sit by the pool in the summer, to listen to the frogs in the pond, to watch the birds that gather at her birdfeeder on the deck. Time. She's had time.

After her last visit to the oncologist it became apparent that her time is getting shorter. Another round of chemo starts after Christmas....and she says "we'll see if that can help". But we all know that her window is closing and this won't go on too much longer.

I love her. I wish she lived a bit closer so I could see her more often. But she knows that my thoughts fly south to Indiana every day. Many times, every day. She knows.

And I am trying to follow her wonderful lead. She is so very positive, and her smiles come right through the line when we talk on the phone. She's been so determined to enjoy every good day, and tolerate every bad day....and then put it behind her and find more good days. She told me the best way she and her husband handle all this is to just sort of ponder the news for a few days, figure out what has to be done.....do it, and then put it aside. Her cancer does not seem to dampen her bright outlook on life. She simply won't allow it to intrude and ruin a good day. I am eternally grateful for the example she is setting. I'm not sure I could be as positive as she has been over the past few years......maybe, maybe not.

So I'm trying to compartmentalize, but today the tear ducts won't cooperate. After talking to her this morning I figure I can take a day or two to "ponder" all this shit and then try to put it behind me and enjoy our connection for what it is. The oldest friendship I have......she knows me the best of anyone left on the planet, and we share many of the same memories. So asI think about her, as I try to follow her example.....my heartstrings are stretching and wrapping her in an everyday hug.

She feels it.....I know she does.

What Do You Do When You Can't Do Much........

It's been a rather slow month around here for me. I'm really not complaining because so many others are dealing with much more life-impacting health problems.....or rather maybe I am complaining just a little bit.

Bunion surgery on November 20th seemed like perfect timing for this year. Our daughter was hosting Thanksgiving....we didn't have to do any Christmas shopping because this year's cruise to Alaska was it for everyone. So I went into the hospital and the surgeon took care of a large bunion and curving toes on my right foot - something I'd been ignoring for about ten years.

And, after four weeks, I am still following his instructions. Using my walker, wearing my special shoe, bending my big toe to increase it's flexibility. Icing my foot, keeping it raised up on a footstool for much of the day, not driving, using my left foot for the pedal on my sewing machine, starting to walk with a little pressure on the top of my foot instead of walking on the heel. (Question: how do you judge "a little"?)

And so when you can't do all the stuff you normally do during a week, what do you do?

I read books, spend too much time watching TV or DVD's, cuddle with my dog, work on a puzzle,  check Facebook every hour or so, spend a few minutes standing and cutting pieces for a quilt back, take a nap......and repeat.

What has Dave been doing for the past month? The shopping, the cooking, the cleaning, the errands, the driving, the dog walking, the bringing things back and forth to me when I forget something. Basically he's turned into a wife.

:-)  Maybe there are some good things about this recovery period!

Counting the Days.....

Fenway is patiently waiting - little does he know that we've basically done NO shopping this year and there is nothing waiting for him under the tree or in his little stocking. Poor guy.

But look at that face.....I guess we can always stuff the stocking with his cookies and find a new squeeky toy at Walgreens. That might keep him entertained for about five minutes.

Merry Christmas anyway Mr. Fenway Underfood Woodard!

Be Princess Di.....

I was working at the computer last week with the television on in the background....some talk show that I was ignoring. I vaguely heard something about the Kardashians' Christmas lists. Apparently a list of gifts they were suggesting viewers could purchase for loved ones.

As I indicated, I wasn't really paying much attention, but I think I did hear one of the sisters suggested a $9,000 purse that was "really nice" and there was something about a new car. Obviously their Christmas gift list is way different than mine.

We don't have cable TV so we don't see too much about the Kardashians....although they are sort of hard to ignore. And don't get me wrong, I do give them a lot of credit for creating something out of nothing.....amazing business women and experts at getting their faces and activities in the news. And I'm sure they do good things for charities they support, it just doesn't get the same coverage. At least I hope they do good things with some of their wealth and position.

Later, the same day, I opened Facebook to check any new posts. There was a lovely picture of Princess Diane with the caption "In a world of Kardashians, be the Di"......or something like that.
A reminder of someone with all the fame she could have wanted or wished to avoid....someone who turned her influence outward to the world. To children, to war ravaged countrysides...to benefit hospitals and more.

She wasn't perfect but perhaps a much better role model than some of the current faces we see every day.

Faith and Truth......?

It's always a big part of the discussion at this time of year. The real "reason for the season". Now that we have social media at our finger tips the back and forth can get quite intense. (I have to think that, in a country where Christmas decorations go up the day after Halloween, the real "reason for the season" sort of gets lost in the shuffle. Posts keep reminding me how many days left until Christmas....posts from stores offer holiday discount coupons. It's sort of like "shop.....shop....shop" and then "oh yes, we better go to church on Christmas Eve or Christmas Day for an hour.")

As I was drifting off to sleep last night I began to ponder the difference between faith and truth. Is there a difference? Does one person's faith represent the only truth? If your faith is different than mine does that mean my truth is wrong.....or is yours leading you straight to "hell"?

So this morning I checked the definition of "faith" according to Merriam Webster. That source lists several definitions, among them:  "belief and trust in and loyalty to God.....firm belief in something for which there is no proof."   

Another web source defines "faith" as: complete trust or confidence in someone or something.....and a strong belief in God or doctrines of a religion, based on spiritual apprehension rather than proof.

So the way I read these definitions, faith and truth may be associated, but faith has no proof. People believe what they believe for many reasons and see their faith as their truth. But I think we need to see that there is more than one "truth" and what is true for one person may not be true for another. It doesn't mean that either person is "wrong"....they just follow a different set of beliefs. They follow a faith journey that helps them to navigate their path in life. They follow a path that gives them hope and answers the un-answerable....for them.

This has been a difficult discussion this year....perhaps more difficult than in previous years. As our world "shrinks" and gets more complicated truths and beliefs and faiths are bumping up against one another. People of faith are being tested as never before.

Interesting how, if you do a little reading and research, you find the basic tenets of many faiths echo one another....but people of faith won't recognize that....or they refuse to believe it.

Faith isn't truth.....and my truth is, we need to look for bridges instead of constructing walls.

Once-A-Year Friends......

Our friends in Glendale, Sam and Evan, host an annual holiday party and it is such fun! We've been attending for years and enjoy the fun, food and the "steal-a-gift" game.

Their party has a slight "twist". Our hosts always pick a theme that you need to keep in mind as you shop for the gift you want to include in the exchange. It makes it even more fun to see how everyone interprets the theme their own way. For example, one year it was "Reuse - Recycle", another year it was "Blue". One time the invitation came asking you to bring "Something from a State" and then there was "Something Small". The packages come in the door, wrapped and ribboned and are put in a big pile on the table in the center of the room. And we've learned over the years to never judge by looking at the box or the size of the box. This year we had to bring "Something You Would Take on a Mission to Mars". (Thanks to a current movie!)

The party has a rhythm.....we gather, visit a bit, enjoy a delicious meal, choose from zillions of desserts (candy, cookies and chocolate reindeer etc. provided by our host's sister Patty). No one counts calories! And then there is the game which, depending on how often gifts are "stolen" can go quickly or take a long time.   :-)

Frankly as we drove away from their house this year I was thinking that my favorite part of the party is the fact that I get to see some very special people I probably won't see again until next December. I really enjoy these once-a-year-friendships....and, yes, it would be fun to see these casual friends more often. But then again.....it probably wouldn't be such a special addition to our holiday season.

Once-a-year-friends......you know who you are! Happy Holidays to all of you......wonder what the theme will be next December!?

Judging a Book By Its Cover......

Today I took the time to click on a link to the Los Angeles Times where I was able to read about each of the victims of the recent terrorist attack in California. As I first glanced at the group of faces I was hit by the thought that these people represented a cross section of America. How ironic.....how sad.

My first thoughts also included the assumption that the faces on the page represented a variety of ethnic backgrounds. A melting pot of employees. Judging books by their covers.


Reading individual information told me that one woman's family fled Iran when she was 18 to escape persecution, another was from a family that fled Vietnam looking for peace and opportunity. Another emigrated from Mexico more than twenty years ago and put himself through college. And yet another man fled violence and repression in his homeland of Eritrea. Fleeing from around the globe to find a new life in America. And they found it.....and went to school, and married, and started families, and bought homes, and made friends, and worked hard.

Until they were assassinated.

And then I looked at the photograph of the killers....the first one showing them as husband and wife apparently taken at the airport when they came to the US after their wedding. In Muslim garb.....and I admit that I, once again, judged that book by its cover.

I don't want to do that.....I don't want to make assumptions. It's not fair to the millions of peace loving Muslims who live here and represent the true tenants of their faith. But these two faces did not look friendly.....perhaps just because of the anonymity of the photograph.....maybe it was taken from a video and they were not aware they were on camera. They looked stern......I would have thought twice before approaching them. But then I thought about how my own photo might look in a similar situation.....tired from a long flight, not quite home yet. People probably would not find a smile on my face either.

I don't want to judge a book by its cover. I want to know individuals and meet new people and assume the best. That's what I want to do. I hope I can.
 
I read each obituary. Looked at each face.  Took a moment. They deserved my attention.

Close Enough......

We have a small family.....two grown "kids". One lives north of Seattle with his family and one lives in West Bend with her husband and two boys. Obviously we see the Wisconsin bunch a lot more frequently than the NW bunch.

And sometimes a visit to West Bend is a bit of an unplanned surprise. For instance, the phone rings at 9:30 p.m. and I hear my daughter talking fast and explaining she is on the way to the hospital with husband in the passenger seat.....probably appendicitis. Her neighbor and good friend is with the kids and another is coming at 10:00 and can stay overnight until 5:00 a.m. when he then has to go home so his wife can go to work!

The long and fast explanation/question was winding down to "could we be over there at 5:00 in the morning to take over kid duty as needed."

The answer was a quick "no"....we would pack a couple tote bags and come to sleep overnight instead. And that's what we did. We arrived, nice neighbor went home and we crawled into bed. Megan arrived home in the middle of the night to let us know surgery was scheduled for the next morning.

Emergency addressed......outcome 100% positive.....recovery going well.

Sometimes it's really good to be close.....to be geographically close enough to help when needed.

A Duplicate?

We often see deer from our condo. We can see them out the windows, in the park or up on the hill above the bike path. We see them when we walk the dog. It's fun to spot them year round and think that a little bit of nature lives hiding in the trees in Port Washington park areas.

Dave took his camera along the other day and spotted a beautiful buck. Standing just off the bike path looking at Fenway as Fenway looked at him.

The next day I got an email from a friend who lives in Franklin, just south of Milwaukee. There was an early morning visitor in her yard. I'm pretty sure it wasn't one of "our" bucks.....but who knows. It's hunting season and these guys aren't dummies. They know hunters are not supposed to be stalking them along neighborhood sidewalks.....so they come on down to say hello. Just for a moment. Just for a glimpse.

Beautiful.

Just Words......

I've been thinking about my school years. Some memories are sharper than others....but that's probably pretty normal. I was remembering school fire drills. I don't recall if we knew that drill was scheduled before the bells went off....but once the alarm echoed down the hallways I remember following teacher's instruction and quietly and calmly leaving the building. Classrooms would gather along the outside of the building and teachers counted heads. We stayed outdside until the fire department was sure the building was empty and then the all clear would ring and back in we'd go. Back in for math, or gym, or biology or whatever class had been interrupted.

A small "excitement" in a normal school day.

I also seem to remember, very vaguely, a "duck and cover" drill during the Cuban missile crisis. We sat under our desks, covering our heads with crossed arms to protect ourselves from an atom bomb. Right.

But we never had a "what to do if there is an active shooter" drill.

Today everyone is talking about San Bernadino. We watched moment by moment TV coverage of another mass shooting. And the talking heads all chimed in with half-information analysis and helpful comments detailing their shock and sending prayers to everyone affected by this latest horror.

And the next morning the experts began to tell us all what to do in case we are at work, or in a mall, or at school, or at the movies, or at the grocery store, or in our condo building, or our neighborhood.....wherever we might be leading "normal" day-to-day life. How we needed to have a plan, to escape, or hide, or fight. Really.

And the social media went wild....and the politicians expressed opinions....and flags are at half staff...and the President gave a press conference where he seemed just so defeated by, once again, having to go before cameras and express his condolences, his concern, his frustration that we, in America, are back in the news....for all the wrong reasons.

And of course lots of people said this would never have happened if everyone was licensed to carry a gun. But then, really, that's not good enough....actually everyone would have to be licensed to carry an assault weapon to equal the playing field. Wouldn't that be great.

I have four grandsons. I don't want them to have participate in a "what to do if there is an active shooter drill" at school. I wrote a blog about this just a few months ago.....and here we are again.

I'm just one person. I write a very small blog with a very small audience. But frankly I am so angry, and so saddened and so wanting our "leaders" to step up and DO something. I'm not naive enough to think this is a problem that can be solved quickly. There are hundreds of thousands of unlicensed guns living in America. And even with better laws and restrictions in place the bad guys will still find ways to arm themselves.

But America has to do something. Individuals who believe that the second amendment was NEVER written to allow this kind of gun ownership and gun activity need to stand up and insist that we see change.....slow change that may take years....but we need to see change.

But then.....these are just words.....just like all the other words we've heard over the past two days.

Just words.....