A Personal Heartbreaking Wait......

The phone call will come....I will see the name on my cell phone's screen, and I won't want to answer. But I will.

Back in March I wrote a blog entry called "A Drip of Hope....". About someone I love very dearly.

Earlier today I got a phone call from her brother. The road called Hope is just about at an end.....and I won't want to answer the next call.

My cousin lived her life to the fullest.....and she is leaving a huge impression on so very many. And a huge hole in a lot of hearts who will mourn her passing. And she's too young....and she has more she wanted to do....more time with grandchildren.....more time with her adult children.....more time with her loving husband. More visits to Colorado to be with family......more laughter, more wine, more good meals, more water colors to paint.....just more.

She is about two years younger than I am. I rage with anger. I ache with grief.

But she would not want that reaction......she would want me, and everyone she loves, to enjoy the day. Smell the roses, watch the birds, walk the dog, go to the movies, read a good book, drink that glass of wine, laugh, be with friends, take a trip, hug someone we love.

She did that. Over the past two and a half years she's lived every day to the fullest. On the good days she did more....on the bad days she did less. But she loved each day she was given.

I won't want to answer that telephone.....but I will.